The talk I wish I'd have given

First, I explain:
Today I spoke in sacrament meeting. I was speaking with Reece, my neighbor and a YSA in the ward. We had been given the topic "Choose you this day" from Joshua 24:15, and also the title of several general conference talks including one from last October by Elder Renlund of the Quorum of the 12 Apostles. (It's a wonderful talk. He has such a way of stringing together doctrines and principles in such a logical and linear way that they just flow seamlessly one to the next and he covers such an array of topics in one talk, tying them all back in with the central theme. I should've just gotten up and read that, it would've been better. But, that also would've been weird so it's probably better I didn't.)
I was meant to speak first, but Bishop said "we're going to switch things up and have Reece speak to us first". It was good for Reece to go first because he had written out his talk and I had only written out scriptures, quotes, and thoughts from my studies. As he spoke I heard many of the thoughts I'd had myself and would've mentioned (I thought) in my talk if I'd gone first. His talk was beautiful and poetical. Then I got up and my thoughts all gave way to a lack of organization and out came a stream-of-consciousness thought vomit of a talk.
People said it made sense. I asked many of them. They were all very complimentary about it. And one sister even said she had something touch her deeply in it, so at least it wasn't a complete waste. But I felt it. It was not good. Not the sort of good I'm used to. It was one long train wreck of a talk that was barely coherent. I said a train wreck, I think a multi-car pile up is more like it. I recognized the wreck as I was speaking but I didn't know how to fix it. I was in fight or flight mode and I just kept chugging on because I didn't know how to get it out of the mess and back on track, the tracks of the quotes and scriptures and thoughts I had prepared. In my panic my logical calm abandoned me and instead of saying "Ok, I'm going to shift gears" and start over with a sensible direction I just tried to connect the thoughts to the last one to say something meaningful, trying to steer it back to Elder Renlund and the things I'd studied, but it just never made it. I rambled. It's to late for me to give the talk directed by the spirit to lift and inspire the souls at sacrament meeting today the way I wanted to. But, perhaps I can pay a bit of penance and put my frustration to rest by giving here, in type, the talk I wish I 'd given at church today.

If you're interested in listening to the actual talk given I tried to embed it but failed so you have to click the link:  Talk given June 16, 2019


"Choose You This Day"

There's a primary (children's) song that begins

I lived in heaven a long time a go, it is true. Lived there and loved there, with people I know, so did you. Then, Heavenly Father presented a wonderful plan- all about Earth and eternal salvation for man.

Before coming here to earth, you and I lived with our Heavenly Father and each other, but as spirits. We learned and grew but had limitations. As spirits we could not obtain the glory our Father had. He had a body, he was perfect, and had a family- and we weren't and didn't. To be able to continue to progress and gain these blessings for ourselves Heavenly Father laid out his plan. We would leave his presence. We would come to earth in mortal bodies and make choices so that we might learn through our experience to know the good from the evil and to learn how to choose the right and leave the bad. We would be left to choose for ourselves, and that would invariably mean we'd make mistakes that if left unremedied meant we would not be able to obtain the glory of life like and with our Heavenly Father, which was the whole purpose of the plan. So, Jehovah was chosen to be our Savior. He would provide the way for us to have the experience we need in life, to be able to "act for [ourselves] and not to be acted upon" and still be reconciled with the demands of justice and the requirements of exaltation. Armed with this plan we agreed to follow Christ and were sent to earth. But, for the sake of the plan we couldn't remember our life before. "Heavenly Father's goal in parenting is not to have His children do what is right; it is to have His children choose to do what is right and ultimately become like Him." said Elder Renlund in his October 2018 conference address. To accomplish this we have to learn and complete the rest of the plan by faith. In the words chosen by Elder Renlund from the Mary Poppins musical "[we've] got to do the next part on [our] own".

In Joshua 24:15 the prophet speaks to his people who are trying to decide how they will live their lives. "Choose you this day" he says. I like the vagueness of "this". "This day" could have many interpretations. We have once chosen to follow Christ and accept him as our Savior and began our way on through our Father's plan. Now we are here and the question arises, in this day- the day of our mortality and forgetfulness- will we choose Him still? Well, we are here at church this Sunday. Most of us have chosen to be baptized and accept the teachings and commandments found in the Restored Church of Jesus Christ. So, we're off to a good start. If we continue, and stay faithful, enduring to the end, we are promised eternal life. This choice is ours. Elder Renlund teaches a profound eternal truth when he said "Agency allows us to choose to get on the path, or not. It allows us to get off, or not. Just as we cannot be forced to obey, we cannot be forced to disobey." So, will you choose to stay on the path? I hope each of us in our hearts just shouted out "Yes!" but how can we be sure? I've been listening to Saints Vol. 1 through the Gospel Library app and the number of saints in the early days of the restoration who witnessed miracles and wonderful things of God but then later abandoned the church, some even fighting against it, makes me wonder- how can I be sure?

This brings me to a second interpretation of the phrase "choose you this day"- today. Each today, choose Christ. So, how can I make sure I endure to the end to receive the promised blessings? Well, choose to. No one can force me off the path- not even Satan and his lies. Each day I choose to remember the miracles I've experience. I choose to remember and believe the witnesses I've received of the truthfulness of the Gospel. Each day I choose to keep the commandments because I choose to believe in the promises given with them. Each day I choose to study the word of God through prophets and apostles and His chosen leaders found in the scriptures, general conference, and other places. Each day choose to spend time talking with Heavenly Father in prayer. As Pres. Uchtdorf once taught: true love is spelled "T-I-M-E" so pray and read and ponder to show and grow your love for Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. Choose to spend your time on that rather than on things of less value.
Pres. Oaks urged us to "consider how we use our time in the choices we make viewing television, playing video games, surfing the internet, or reading books and magazines." Do we choose to do these things in a time allotment that is consistent with their eternal importance? Or are we so busy "entertaining ourselves to... spiritual death" that we grow distant from our Savior and his Spirit? That is a question I've wrestled with repeatedly throughout my life. I'm grateful for our prophet's invitation to take a fast from social media. I don't use many social media sites, but it shines a light on the amount of time in general I spend on the internet so the most recent time we were invited to fast it wasn't facebook I was focused on but just time wasting/life absorbing habits that were sucking the life out of my life and leaving it empty and blah- mainly stemming from the internet. So I gave up YouTube among other things and reminded myself to use my time better things than trivialities. Just to clarify, YouTube is not inherently bad, neither is social media. But, it is not worthy of the time most of us bestow so graciously upon it each day. (Which do you spend more time on daily, social media or the scriptures? I know I have work to do there.) We're never going to be perfect at using our time only for the best things to do each second of the day- fact. But, as we strive to improve our discipline in that area we will enjoy more of our Father's love and approval for our choices and we will be more satisfied with our life.
Then, above all, when we have done our best- or sometimes maybe not the best- do we choose to be humble and seek for refining and strengthening from the Atonement? Do we choose to repent and work towards becoming like our Heavenly Father bit by bit? It is by these daily choices that our choice of a lifetime comes to fruition and we gain our eternal reward that we set out for. "So, choose faith in Christ; choose repentance; choose to be baptized and receive the Holy Ghost; choose to conscientiously prepare for and worthily partake of the sacrament; choose to make covenants in the temple; and choose to serve the living God and his children".

As I read one choice that came up again and again was the choice to not only live the gospel and seek our exaltation, but to share what we know and seek that all men might partake of the waters of life, as we have been blessed to. Brothers and Sisters- I 100% include myself in this- we must do better. If you are anything like me, you are not like Sister Harding and can't just strike up a conversation with the grocery clerk about the Book of Mormon. But the Lord is not asking for us to all force ourselves to be Rosie. He's asking us to love him and love our fellow men and forget ourselves and go to work. I find, almost always, when I miss a chance to share something I know about the gospel it's because I was thinking about myself. In the novel Pride and Prejudice, Lady Catherine lectures on the importance of practice for becoming a great pianist. Later, Elizabeth Bennett turns this around on William Darcy when he admits that he does not have a talent for speaking to those he is not well acquainted with. She replies that perhaps he should take his aunt, Lady Catherine's advice- and practice. Last conference Elder Uchtdorf taught us that we should 1. Draw close to God, 2. Fill our heart with love for others, 3. Strive to walk the path of discipleship, 4. Share what is in your heart, and 5. Trust the Lord to work his miracles. Those are choices that we all can make each day to become more like our Savior who never stopped, and still hasn't, seeking to bring his Father's children back to Him. As we make those simple choices it will help us and others "choose this day" and return to our Father one day. "Remember," Elder Uchtdorf said, "the Lord has never required expert, flawless missionary efforts [or ministering efforts]. Instead the Lord requires the heart and a willing mind"

Finally, we can choose this day, the sabbath day, to serve the Lord. Much has been said in recent years about keeping the Sabbath day holy and making it a delight. This is something I have recently recognized a personal weakness in and I'm seeking now to understand better what that means and how to do that. I think I might not be alone in this, especially with the recent changes that have been made to our Sunday meeting schedule. In preparing for this talk I studied Elder Oaks' talk "Good, Better, Best" from 2007. I found a very interesting passage in there "But, here is a caution for families. Suppose Church leaders reduce the time required by Church meetings and activities in order to increase the time available for families to be together. This will not achieve its intended purpose unless individual family members- especially parents- vigorously act to increase family togetherness and one-on-one time." Again, that was over 10 years before the introduction of Come Follow Me for individuals and families and the change in the Sunday meetings. Kinda blows my mind (it's like they're prophets or something, am-I-right?). So, now the Church leaders have reduced the time required by Church meetings. How are we choosing to fill that time? Are we using it to study Come Follow Me? Are we using it to spend time with family and loved ones? Are we using it to minister and lift those around us? Are we using it to sleep? to scroll through social media? I confess I have not vigorously acted to make the best use of that time, but I am now choosing to do something about it and I am choosing to make different choices on Sunday to better show to my Father and to my Savior that they are important to me and I want to know them better. And I think that's really what we're asked to do in the end, is just keep trying. The choice is ours. That being said, I testify that as we are "careful" and "not casual" about this commandment we will be blessed in the 6 other days of the week to have the time and energy to make the right choices and accomplish every needful thing. I have been blessed for my attempts to honor the sabbath day and I know our Father is proud each time we seek to improve and come closer to him and our Savior through our choices on this day.

Brothers and Sisters, our Father doesn't want to tell us every thing that we should do. He has a plan for you and me, but that plan includes us choosing where to go, what to do, and who we will be. In the grand scheme of things as well as the daily questions he wants us to make choices, but he wants us to make the best choices- not the good or better ones. He's given us repentance for those inevitable mistakes- large and small- and a Savior who loves and helps us every step on the way. As we strive to make these best choices and follow our Savior's example we will "develop the attributes of godliness, [return] to our Heavenly Father, and [receive] enduring joy." and "We will become our best self", what could be worth more than that? It's not always easy, the call of the world is loud and persistent but I promise it is worth it. The Plan of Salvation is real, and we truly can have joy in this life and eternal life in the world to come- if we but so choose. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

My Fair Lady

I recently purchased the My Fair Lady sountrack which prompted me to re-watch the movie, which I'd only seen once before. I didn't particularly love it the first time I watched it. I especially disliked the ending, as so many do. But the second time around I was able to put some things together- knowing the end from the beginning- that I'd missed the first time and I appreciated it much more. (Also, reading the wikipedia info about the ending helps too.) In fact, I dare say I quite like it. The music is pretty great, Rex Harrison is really funny, and Audrey Hepburn truly makes her accent painful to your ears. But the that helped me like it more than anything else was seeing in it a fantastic analogy for ourselves. (I bet you were wondering why this was on my gospel blog, well now you know.)

In the beginning, when Eliza, Henry, Freddie, the Queen of Transylvania, ect were all born there was no fundamental difference between them as people. They were all born as human beings, one as innocent as the other. The differences that lead them to different places didn't have to do with them, but the family they were born into. As they grew up they received different levels of education, quality of upbringing, and style of clothing. They through these things found their place in life- but one being a queen and the other a poor gentleman or even a flower girl still doesn't make one better than the other. They are all still just people. However, these affect their personality, their social status, their social position, and ultimately their sense of self. Eliza at first sees herself as a nobody and others do too- not because she is actually less than they are but because of external differences. Then, one comment from a belligerent man opens her mind to an idea she's not had before. She could be something more than what she is. She could work in a flower shop or as a lady's maid. There was one who could show her how to gain what she lacks and she could reach a higher potential. At the end of the show she is faced with Henry Higgins who still refers to her as "baggage", a "hussy", and a "squashed cabbage leaf". She makes a very astute observation:

 "I should never have known how ladies and gentlemen really behaved, if it hadn't been for Colonel Pickering. He always showed what he thought and felt about me as if I were something better than a common flower girl. You see, Mrs. Higgins, apart from the things one can pick up, the difference between a lady and a flower girl is not how she behaves, but how she is treated. I shall always be a common flower girl to Professor Higgins, because he always treats me like a common flower girl, and always will. But I know that I shall always be a lady to Colonel Pickering, because he always treats me like a lady, and always will."

In the light of this comment you notice that Eliza was only finally able to correctly enunciate "the rain in Spain..." after the only instance of polite and compassionate understanding Higgins shows her the whole show. It's when she is shown that she can indeed be a lady that she begins to become one.
Like Eliza and all the rest we come to this earth in different circumstances but all having one thing in common- we are all human beings. As such we are all children of our Heavenly Father who loves us and wants us to become like he is. He wants us to be ladies and gentlemen- not necessarily in wealth, leisure, and title here on earth but in demeanor and quality. As humans we all end up in a situation like Eliza. We are not all that we can become. We see ourselves as mere humans, better or worse than the next person, stuck in our lot in life. Now, as far as social status and earthly things we may or may not end up somewhere other than where we started- but the Holy Ghost whispers to the heart of all men- "You are meant for higher things than this world. You are a god in training." When we hear this we have two choices- we can continue to wallow about in the low and simple ways of the world or we can listen to his voice and seek the one who can help us change and receive the things we've been told we can achieve. In fact, if we will seek this being and do everything we're asked to do and keep going- even when it's 3 in the morning and we have a splitting headache- we will find the end results will far exceed our wildest dreams. We will find ourselves not just as ladies and gentlemen, but gods and goddesses. Unlike Henry Higgins, Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ- the duo tasked with molding us into a new creature- never view us as a squashed cabbage leaf. We are all, even in our lowest and basest state, heirs to a throne and they will always treat us like that. Sometimes that means we'll get reprimanded. Sometimes we'll be asked to do difficult things and stretch ourselves immensely. And some days we're going to feel like they don't love us, have forgotten us, or have given up on us- but they never will. If anyone quits it will be us- don't do that.

You are not a squashed cabbage leaf.

Come unto Christ, you are worth the world to Him and his only goal is to get you back to your rightful place along with him and our Heavenly Father. Trust him and follow him. Think of what's at stake! Eternal life. Worlds without end. Eternal families. Oh, won't it be lovely.

Go to the Source - a weird teaching experience turned into a Christmas message

I have a lot of interesting experiences as a teacher. Some reward some try some are just plain weird. One trying and often confusing thing is student evaluations. (I wish we got to evaluate the students. I wonder how they'd like it if their teachers got a chance to anonymously write all the things we've been thinking about them.) Today I was browsing through the standard "this teacher is a joke" and "this class stinks" comments when I came across this fabulous little gem:

"I noticed that our teacher had some very small writing on her inner forearm that could be hidden under her sleeve. It was discouraging as a student to see my teacher cheating. I don't know for sure that that is what it was, perhaps it is a tattoo, but I'm pretty sure that the writing changed form time to time and it looks like cheating to me. Made me not want to work hard in class because I know that we would be in big trouble with her if she caught any of us cheating. Didnt appreciate that."

Wow. Just wow. I laughed like a hyeena when I read this. It's so absurd. Let me detail why:

1. They assumed that writing on my arm was cheating. Cheating for what? I take a notebook into class every day, so not "cheating" for teaching. Cheating for my other classes? Yeah, because I can fit enough in a line or two on my arm that it's going to help me in an Analysis test.. Ha! I'm not in 1010 where I need to have the quadratic formula memorized...
2. When I read this I had "wrap gifts" written on my arm. I wish I could show that to them. They'd feel really dumb and I'd love to see their face. (No I'm not vindictive much, why do you ask?)
3. Fact- I almost never teach in long sleeves. I wear layers in the winter and usually teach in a t-shirt because it's just too warm in these buildings to be teaching in long sleeves. I have 1 long sleeve shirt that I wear regularly. So I don't know what sleeve they think I'm hiding it under
4.  Most important point of all: why did they not just ask me what it was? Obviously it concerned them enough that they wrote about it anonymously in my reviews so why didn't they do something or ask about it? "Hey, what that on your arm?" "Oh, I need to remember to take out the trash tonight..." Scandal! Or if they were really so concerned about their teacher cheating on.. something... why didn't they report it to someone who could look into it? Instead they just fabricated some crazy theory about what it was (which might be revealing of where their own mind was.) and used it as an excuse of why it was the teachers fault they did poorly in class.

I find this is a symptom people in general suffer when it comes to God. We see something that happens and we fish around in our brains and decide on something that sort of fits with what happened and what we think/feel/want and we cook up an explanation. I'm sure Heavenly Father is sitting up there going "What in the world are they thinking? Where do they come up with these things? Why don't they just ask!?" The solution is right there in front of us. "Ask and ye shall receive, seek and ye shall find, knock and it shall be opened unto you" (Bible, Book of Mormon, about 80 places...) The scriptures promise that if we pray the Lord will answer (in his own way and time, but He'll answer). Well, so what if you don't believe the scriptures?

If someone told you that you could make a fake volcano by mixing vinegar and baking soda, but you had never seen it before you have 3 options: 1. Take their word for it. 2. Don't take their word for it and disbelieve. 3. Try it. If you choose option 2 you will go through your life never knowing the awesomeness of the vinegar/baking soda volcano- even though it's a true thing. Why didn't you know about it? Because you chose not to believe. If you decide to find out for yourself, but you go to the store and buy flour and vinegar or baking soda and gatorade, you're not going to get good results and you'll go through your life not believing in vinegar/baking soda awesomeness because you convinced yourself that you tried it and it didn't work. This applies in so many things in "real life". If you want a loan but don't fill out the paperwork, you won't get one. If you have a problem with your phone but you never call the customer service it won't get fixed. If you want to know how to make a good garden but you talk to a bunch of engineers you probably won't get very much info. That's not because the engineers aren't smart- they just probably aren't experts in horticulture. If you want to know things you have to go to the appropriate source. If you want something to turn out right, you need to follow the appropriate steps to make it happen.

Well, it's the same thing for spiritual matters. If I want to know if the scriptures are true I won't find out by discussing them with people. I have to go to the source. I have to read the scriptures. I have to ponder the things I read. I have to try out the teachings. And then I have to pray to Heavenly Father, in the name of Jesus Christ, to know if the words I read are true. That is the way that God has said we can come to find out the truth for ourselves.
" Behold, I would exhort you that when ye shall read these things, if it be wisdom in God that ye should read them, that ye would remember how merciful the Lord hath been unto the children of men, from the creation of Adam even down until the time that ye shall receive these things, and ponder it in your hearts.

  And when ye shall receive these things, I would exhort you that ye would ask God, the Eternal Father, in the name of Christ, if these things are not true; and if ye shall ask with a sincere heart, with real intent, having faith in Christ, he will manifest the truth of it unto you, by the power of the Holy Ghost." (Book of Mormon, Moroni 10:3-4)

Then once we've done this, and continue to do this, the truth will be revealed through the Holy Ghost. Peace and joy and assurance will come and you will know of truth.

We can try to find truth in other ways, but we aren't guaranteed results. And we may walk around all our lives never reaping the benefits of living by the truth because we act like we tried it and it didn't work, when really we didn't try it any more than using flour and water is trying to make a vinegar and baking soda volcano.

This Christmas time I would like to add my testimony to the vast pool of witnesses of Jesus Christ, our Redeemer and Savior. I know he lives. I know he died and was resurrected to save man from their sins. (From, not in) I know these things because I have taken the steps and found out for myself that there is a God in heaven, He loves us, and He gave us the gift of his son. Give yourself a gift this Christmas. Give yourself hope. Gift yourself faith. Gift yourself peace. Read the scriptures, come to know of their truthfulness and then do something about it.

Learning

Our gospel doctrine class today was on "Learning by the Holy Ghost". We didn't actually talk much about that specifically, but talked a lot about the what, why, and how of learning. I thought it was a very appropriate topic with the start of school ominously looming just off the horizon for so many in that class. We could all do, I think, with a little reminder of what a blessing higher educational opportunities are- not a curse. The thing that I was impressed the most with in our discussion is actually a comment that I said. Now, I'm not being all proud of myself here, it was just one of those moments when the Spirit teaches you in the moment and you learn as you're making the comment. We were discussing the importance of learning and Doctrine and Covenants 130:18-19 was naturally brought up.

 "18 Whatever principle of intelligence we attain unto in this life, it will rise with us in the resurrection. 19 And if a person gains more knowledge and intelligence in this life through his diligence and obedience than another, he will have so much the advantage in the world to come."  

All the usual comments were made about the importance of gaining knowledge, then I made a comment I thought was pretty neat. I realized that all the points that had been made were true, but if you read these verses a different way it leads to another meaning. Think of our pre-mortal life. We know, through modern revelation, that we lived as spirits before we came to earth. We lived with Heavenly Father and wanted to be like him. So, one of the reasons the earth was created and we came down to it was that we had maxed out on what we could learn as spirits and needed our mortal experience, body and all, to go any further. Thus is our mortal life. We will eventually reach a point when we have maxed out on what we can learn in this state and will move on to the next, first possibly as spirits then resurrected beings. Before we came to earth we were taught, and taught, the gospel and other things.

 A quote I quite like from Elder Bruce R. McConkie: "All the spirits of men, while yet in the Eternal Presence, developed aptitudes, talents, capacities, and abilities of every sort, kind, and degree. During the long expanse of life which then was, an infinite variety of talents and abilities came into being. As the ages rolled, no two spirits remained alike. Mozart became a musician; Einstein centered his interest in mathematics; Michelangelo turned his attention to painting. . . . Abraham and Moses and all of the prophets sought and obtained the talent for spirituality..." In the premortal world we studied and learned various things according to our interests. Then when we were born we had the opportunity to use that knowledge and skill as we again sought it out, the indication being that it came much more easily and fully the second time. Then as we pass on to the 3rd stage of our immortal lives we get to retain our knowledge and skills and continue to build upon them. But there's something more as well. If we are to become like Heavenly Father we'll need to learn gobs more than we ever could in this life. It won't all come just because we're resurrected, but will come as we study and learn, same as on earth (hopefully more quickly and more fully too). So those who exerted themselves in the premortal realm came to earth with a natural ability to learn the thing they had studied. It seems also that the thing that will give us "so much the advantage in the world to come" is the ability to study and learn. I don't really know how much use my ability to play sports will be after this life, but I'm sure that the ability I have to learn quickly new skills and rules of the games will help me as I learn to become like my father. I see this as I teach math. I had students who come into class with poor skills but who do well in the class because they know how to study and to persevere when a subject is hard. Then there are very bright students, or even ones who have taken the class before, who do not pass the class even though they probably have all the requisite background knowledge and brain cells needed to pass it. They mostly do not pass because they do not know how to study. It makes sense that as we progress it won't necessarily matter if we had a diploma of one level or another, but how well we have cultivated our desire and ability to learn while we were in this stage of our life.

So, as I face returning to school I am grateful for the chance I have to further my knowledge (and for all those that make it possible for me to do so), and I also have more appreciation for the difficult times that lie ahead that will teach me how to stick it out and learn how to learn.

A thought on women and the priesthood

I don't claim to have any real special insight into this question that has been bouncing around social media and the news recently, not so much since the last general conference but still recently. The question of whether women can/will/should be ordained to the priesthood isn't one I've bothered to waste much time fretting about. I really don't care much. My personal feelings have always been that it's not something that will happen, but I'm fine with that. I don't, in any sense, feel inferior to or diminished by the brothers with the authority of the priesthood because I don't have it. The blessings of the priesthood are available to all through those who hold the authority and through the covenants we make with God, especially through the temple. Women have other things to be concerned about without rushing about being bishops and giving blessings. But, I said it's not something I've thought much about and here I am writing a whole blog post about it. Why? It starts with a talk, then some scriptures.

Resources:

• Sister Carol M. Stephens, "We Have Great Reason to Rejoice", General Relief Society Meeting, October 2013 

• Doctrine and Covenants section 84. Particularly vs. 33-40, 54-58, and 61-62.

One day a while back I was listening to Sis. Stephen's talk while I got ready for school. I wasn't listening for any special reason, or looking for any particular answers I just had it on while I did my hair. Sis. Stephens was talking about covenants and what it means to be a covenant keeper. I don't know what she said, but something just popped into my head as I listened. "The priesthood is a covenant. Men are proxy ordained in the temple for the dead." or something to that affect. As I said, the question of women and the priesthood had never much bothered me, except all the fuss women were raising over nothing and looking like faithless idiots (in my opinion) while they were at it. (I mean, really, you think trying to get into priesthood session is a good idea? Just watch it online or read it, no big deal people. Anyway...) But here was this truth stuck into my thoughts as I listened to an unrelated talk (for a related talk, listen to Sis. Stephen's talk in the Sunday morning general conference meeting.) on a topic I'm not worried about. But like most thoughts like this one it didn't just come and go but lingered over the next few days. I thought more about it during my scripture study and decided to look up the scripture containing the well known to Mormons phrase "the oath and covenant of the priesthood". Enter Doctrine and Covenants 84: 33-40.

I'll interject here a definition, with a very appropriate example sentence, courtesy of Google.
Oath:

noun

noun: oath; plural noun: oaths

1.

a solemn promise, often invoking a divine witness, regarding one's future action or behavior.

"they took an oath of allegiance to the king"

synonyms:

vow, pledge, sworn statement, promise, avowal, affirmation, word, word of honor, bond, guarantee

So, when men are ordained to the priesthood they make an oath, one could say, of allegiance to the King, our Savior, and make a covenant with him. Covenants in the LDS faith are not a small thing. They are the way back to heaven. They are the way Heavenly Father has designed for us to obtain certain blessings through obedience and his grace. On lds.org we find this about ordinances
"In the Church, an ordinance is a sacred, formal act performed by the authority of the priesthood. Some ordinances are essential to our exaltation. These ordinances are called saving ordinances. They include baptism, confirmation, ordination to the Melchizedek Priesthood (for men), the temple endowment, and the marriage sealing."
Note, this is officially published by the church information. Ordination to the Melchizedek Priesthood is a saving ordinance for men. So, here comes the logic and reasoning:
If it's an essential thing for men to make this covenant by receiving the priesthood, thus why it's done in temples for deceased brethren, doesn't it make sense that if women were to receive the priesthood it would also be an essential, saving ordinance like it is for the guys? Does it make sense that Heavenly Father would set the work of family history and temple work going for almost 2 centuries then make a dramatic switch in what women need to be exalted? No, not really. Why would he have all the temple work done for these people then make us go back and tack on one more thing afterwords? And this wouldn't just be for people who died without the gospel, we're talking any woman who's lived in this dispensation at least. And since there's no indication of women ever having been given the priesthood in the past we're probably looking at every woman who's ever lived. Think of that. If God didn't give the priesthood to Eve when she and Adam were kickin it on the earth, why would he make us go back and give it to her millennia afterwords? Seems kinda silly when you think about it.
I feel like someone out there might say something about  making receiving the priesthood for women an optional thing, like going on a mission. Nope. See, going on a mission is an optional thing for women precisely because we do not hold the priesthood and being a full time missionary (or doing your best to do so) is a priesthood duty/obligation. So, if women were to receive the priesthood it would be just as necessary as the other ordinances we already participate in such as baptism and the endowment.That would sure put a lot of women to work in the temple! But ask yourself, does this sound like the plan of an all knowing, ultimately wise god who knows the end from the beginning and has a perfect plan for our salvation? No, not really. It sounds like craziness. "Um, I guess now this group can have this particular ordinance after millions of years of not having it, and hundreds of years of temple work not including it." It's chaos and confusion and not like the Heavenly Father I believe in.
Now, theoretically, could it happen? Sure. There's no obvious biological, spiritual, or social reason why women couldn't have the priesthood in that sense. The simple fact is though that it's Christ's church and we do things his way. If Christ says "No, that's not how it's done" that should be enough for us. And when you think about it, either way it does not help nor hinder our ability to follow God's plan and obtain exaltation. I can return to Heavenly Father's presence just fine without it, so why petition and question and fret about it? I seem to remember something in the scriptures about not seeking to council the Lord. Let him do his work, and focus on following Him and doing your own work. You can petition, beg, demand, plead, and pray for something but unless it's part of His plan it's not going to change and you're just going to be frustrated and upset. Better plan, pray for the prophets. Pray that they'll be guided and directed in these times of turmoil. Then pray for faith to follow their direction.

Moving on, a few more thoughts on the topic before I finish this extremely long entry-
As you keep reading D&C 84 you get to 54-58, 61-62. I feel like this pertains precisely to our present day and this situation. "And your minds in times past have been darkened because of unbelief, and because you have treated lightly the things you have received...not only to say, but to do according to that which I have written—  That they may bring forth fruit meet for their Father’s kingdom..." What is it they have forgotten that they have received? What is it they must do? What is the fruit that they must bring forth? I would suggest that it is the gift of the Relief Society. The actions of Visiting Teaching. The fruit of missionary labors. These are wonderful blessings that do not require the priesthood authority to participate in. The Relief Society is a miracle and a blessing. Why would anyone want to substitute Elder's Quorum for Relief Society? Visiting Teaching is a huge responsibility, as are the general RS goals of helping the poor and needy in spiritual and in temporal needs. Why would the Lord lay on us more requirements and duties if we are not first doing the ones we have been given? And why would he remove the wonderful program of Relief Society where it fills such a needed roll that the Priesthood organization doesn't necessarily fill in the same way? We are all under the same commandment to preach the gospel to every nation, tongue, and people. We can do that at any age, no matter our race, gender, marital status, or length of membership in the church. When it comes down to the essentials it doesn't matter if you have the priesthood or not, you can do the Lord's work just the same. I would be really curious to talk to some of these women who are pushing so hard for this change about the Relief Society. Do they love it? Do they know it's deep history? Do they understand it's purpose along side the organization of the priesthood in the church?

I don't mean to sound rude or antagonistic towards those who are pushing for this change. I just cannot comprehend their standpoint in the light of the scriptures and modern revelation. I believe that we are all sons and daughters of a loving Heavenly Father. He created a plan that would allow us to become as he is, perfect and perfectly happy. He organized the plan of salvation, perfectly. He sent his perfect Son to atone for our illnesses, pains, afflictions, temptations, trials, death, and sins. (Alma 7:11-13) He restored the gospel to the earth through a living prophet, and continues to guide it through his chosen servants.   

 8 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord.

 9 For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts. -Isaiah 55

I believe that Christ is the head of his church. He has got it under control and will lead it in the correct path until the end of time. Our duty is to be obedient and do His work in spreading the gospel. Who's got time for standing in line to not get into meetings we're not invited to? We've got work to do. Best get crackin!

Stake Conference: Participating in the Work of Salvation

I've been slacking a little with my Sunday reports, and with most everything, the last few weeks. I've taken many Sunday afternoon naps and spent one Sunday ironing applique to a dress and making gold duct tape boots for Halloween. Not the best use of my sabbath day ever. So I decided to get back to it and take up again with blogging my gospel learning from time to time. Today seemed like a good time to start because it was stake conference and pretty great.

It was a regional broadcast so Elder Parry of the Quorum of the 12 Apostles, Elders Zwick and Callister or the 70, and Sis. Oscarson the Young Women's president, all came to the USU Spectrum to speak. We just went to our stake center and listened over broadcast, but we didn't mind because it was a better view and more comfy seats anyway. The theme was not hard to detect. "Participating in the Work of Salvation". I think every single speaker used that exact phrase at least once. Elder Zwick probably used it 10 times. They didn't just focus on missionary work, but also on ensuring our own salvation and that of our families by coming closer to Christ. All the talks were good, but Elder Callister's really got me thinking.

He talked about several ways to PitWoS, but he spent a while talking about personal salvation and doing the things we need to in order to become more like Christ and have the faith and spiritual strength we need to assist others in working towards their salvation as well.It was pretty well aimed at things I've struggled with. He talked about the importance of learning, and teaching our kids, not just to pray, but how to pray. Prayer was compared to playing racket ball. If you hit a ball softly, it returns off the wall softly. If you really hit it hard it will return with almost equal force. If we pray with little force or conviction we can expect that they will not be returned with much speed or power. But when we learn to pray with force and the power of the Spirit we open up the door for answers and guidance and the Holy Ghost to return with equal power. He told a story of when he was around 18 years old saying his nightly prayers- unaware of his mother standing in the doorway of his bedroom. When he finished she asked if he had prayed for God to send him a good spouse. He responded that he wasn't even thinking about that, he was only 18 after all, but she encouraged him to pray for that as it would be of paramount importance in his life. Makes me think, how much do I pray about things like that? Do I pray about those things that are of the most importance in my life?

In a similar way he compared scripture study to food. Once a parent asked a music teacher if their child had to practice their instrument every day. The teacher responded with "No, only on the days they want to eat." He said the same goes for our scripture study. Do we have to study every day? No, only on days we want to eat. Why should we nourish our physical body and ignore our spiritual well being? He told of his habit as a lawyer of coming to work and spending time in the scriptures before he would begin calling people and sorting through case files. He would often look at all the work that needed to be done and think he should begin right away, but the spirit would always tell him "No, stick with the scriptures." I think I should listen to that more often. Things will get taken care of, put the scriptures, temple, prayer, first. Finally he compared scripture study to, not just regular food, but Pop-eye's spinach. He would eat his spinach and all his muscles would bulge and he'd have power to fight of the bad guys or whatever he needed to do.  So does scripture study provide us with power to ignore temptation and stand up for what is right.

Again it just drives home the importance of doing those daily things that connect us to Christ and our Heavenly Father. As we do those things then we'll have the courage and understanding needed to reach out to those around us, in whatever method we can, to share the gospel with them and invite them to come unto Christ and learn of him. As Sis. Oscarson said, success isn't the convert baptism, it's the invitation given with love. My personal mission plan needs to begin with improving my own faith and diligence in the daily things. Then I'll have an added measure of the Spirit and power to be better at opening my mouth and extending invitations to those around me. Sounds like a good plan to me.

Nuggets from a coupel Sundays

I didn't write after sacrament meeting last week. I fell asleep instead. It was the weekend of our Turner side's girl's night out in Park City and we had gone to bed late and gotten up rather early so I could make it to church on time. I was impressed I even made it through church without falling asleep. But, alas, it caught up to me in the afternoon and I slept most of the remainder of the day. Despite my diminished mental capacity last week, (and in truth this week too) I remember it being a very good block at church and even enjoying the "Meet the Stake Presidency" fireside that evening. We also had a good block of classes today and a lovely ward prayer thought. I've decided I would just write down some notes from my journal instead of commenting on one theme in this post. But who knows, maybe I'll get drawn off by something in the middle of my list, maybe I won't. We'll see...

• Being virtuous is being like Christ. Being virtuous is having power- power to act, power against sin...
• Don't judge, just have compassion. The Savior is described a few times as 'being filled with compassion'. As we are compassionate we will be filled with charity.
• Start your day with prayer, but remember- you don't have to pray about yourself. There are way too many people who need blessings for you to only pray for yourself- ever. 
• Fast and pray about relationships.
• Just worry about being the best sister you can.
• Want to be Christ's friend? Give your life for him.

In truth, that's probably 60% of the notes I've taken the last 2 Sundays. But at least they're good notes. To end I want to just throw out a question that I thought while I was reviewing my journal. It actually arose from notes on the last CES broadcast by Elder Nelson. He left an apostolic blessing at the end. This is what I wrote down "Feast upon the word of Christ and live their teachings. Live as Christ desires and be an example. [We are promised]  success in school and work that [we] may serve others. [Promised] health and strength to fulfill God's destiny for me".
Now, first of all, it's interesting to think about "God's destiny for me". I've been feeling lately a lot like there's no big plan. I was just brought to this point and sent out into the ocean of life to swim about as I wish within the safety guidelines and wherever I end up it doesn't really matter- it's the obedience that matters. But at the same time a part of me keeps saying 'No, that's not right. There's a plan, there's a destination. There must be things at work here that I just don't understand yet'. Yet, it's hard to see how this could ever come into focus as a time of preparation or growth. It just feels like a time of hanging around, waiting to figure out what's next... But that's not the point.
The point was the line before that "Success in school and work that I may serve others". I am in school right now as a grad student at USU studying math. I also teach a math class on campus as part of this grad program. How will my masters, my education, my knowledge of random unapplicable math, allow me to serve others? I don't know. Maybe at this time it will be more of a I'll have success so I don't have to spend every waking moment studying and then I'll have time and energy to serve others. Yeah, that sounds nice. I'll take that.